Divorce is a break-taking phase in everyone’s life, especially when the couple has kids. Although children can have a severe impact on their minds when their parents are no more together, parents are supposed to take children’s mental health seriously during this phase of life.
Many people who have experienced their parent’s separation at early age do not rely on marriage and such a relationship and others may have a violent reaction against their opposite gender. You not only have to take care of yourself and control your emotions but also thing about your children. These issues may also hurt you as a separated parent; therefore, Right Lawyers, divorce lawyer in Las Vegas, requests couples to keep the following things in their minds when going through this crucial phase of their lives.
Be silent about the reasons for separation
Children have no worries and are quick to forget – one of the greatest fallacies of mankind. What goes on in the little minds and how much suffering rests on young shoulders should never be underestimated. Therefore, every child, even if they are very young, deserves an explanation when their parents separate. If explanatory words are omitted, the child will find their own version of the explanation and this is usually not in their favor. Children often think it is their own fault that mom and dad no longer understand each other. They come to the conclusion that with the right behavior they could have prevented the breakup. You should definitely take this belief away from your child. Talk to your child and make it clear that the breakup has absolutely nothing to do with the child’s behavior.
If the children are a little older, they often take on more responsibility in the event of a separation than is appropriate for their age. They worry about their parents and put their own problems aside when they see how badly the mother or father is doing. Here, too, honest and open interaction is important in order to create clear relationships. Parental separation is of course a burden for a child, but it should not give up its role as a child and take on all the worries.
Many children of divorce, especially children of primary school age, are ashamed of the problematic family situation. They compare themselves to the other seemingly perfect families and feel embarrassed about their situation. Here, too, you can help your child with conversations. For example, ask your child whether they still know a child with separated parents (sure!) And whether this child now also has two children’s rooms? Take the taboo away from your child that they may have imposed on themselves, because separated parents are no longer uncommon these days.
Cancel visits too often
The fear of completely losing a parent is very great in children. In addition to open, explanatory conversations, there is another aspect to calm your child: keep appointments. All good words are of no use if in practice the visits to dad are constantly omitted. Your child must be able to rely on you to heal the shock of the breakup. It means a lot to children when some things do not change despite the separation. As a dad, did you always attend the soccer tournaments on Sundays? Keep trying to set it up. This shows the child that the parents’ love for them has not changed after the divorce.
Want to do everything by yourself
Separation is a time of crisis for everyone involved. A major upheaval for parents and children demands all nervous resources. It is not always possible to keep the children away from his anger at the ex-partner or to hide his own pain. And practical changes such as moving, sharing common property or dealing with authorities require a lot of time, energy and nerves. Get help during this time and accept support! Spending a weekend with the children with their grandmother gives you a deep breath and gives you space to deal with the situation. Impartial helpers who are neither one nor the other faction help your child through this grueling time and give you a break.
Underestimate the harm to the child
If the family situation changes drastically, children react very differently. Basically, a child should always have the feeling that he is allowed to express his feelings. Sudden fits of anger, a pronounced need to cuddle or grief do not have to be signs of a developmental disorder, but are the way in which your child adapts to the changed family situation. Your child’s behavior shows you what they need. If it seeks your presence more often than usual, react to it and address these needs. If they suddenly become noticeably aggressive, talk to your child about what is really bothering them. Behind a tantrum there is usually a scared, sad and confused child’s soul who wants to be hugged.
Use the child as leverage
Unfortunately, it is not uncommon for parents to abuse their child as a means of pressure. If this or that condition is not met, the other parent is simply no longer allowed to see the child. Such threats are completely inappropriate, because blackmailing with the greatest fear – not to be allowed to see the child – also affects the child. Taking advantage of the other’s fear poisons the atmosphere and disrupts a healthy relationship between parent and child.
Outstanding child support payments and other highly explosive and difficult issues are very, very difficult to resolve – no question about it. But the child should never have to suffer for it, because least of all can do it for it. Treat it that way, because despite all arguments, there is probably one thing that all moms and dads, divorced or not, agree on: love for their child.
For further advice on separation, divorce, or children’s mental and physical health during the divorce proceedings, feel free to contact Right Lawyers, located in Las Vegas. Our team is always ready to serve you and suggest you the right path that may benefit you and your children.
